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Gibbon Brain

Category:
USHISTORY
Question:
What was the first capital of the United States?
Answer:
Punishment was the first capital of the United States. It was located in the "neck" of the woods right outside Salem, Massachusetts. Since basically the first crimes that were committed were those of supposed witchcraft, they would take them to this location to hang them because it was supposed that the devil resided in the woods. What better place to hang these people than in the devil's living room, so to speak. So, when the first accused were to be hung, the marshal (yes they had marshals back then) asked the judge where to take the accused to be hung, the judge said, "Take them to Punishment!" and the marshal asked, "Oh, you mean the Capital, Punishment?"

The judge said, "yes." So each time that there was a new prisoner to be hung the judge would say to the marshal, take him to the Capital, Punishment. Soon to save time he deleted the word "the" and just said, take him to Capital Punishment. Soon all criminals who were to be punished by death were taken to Punishment, because it is assumed that anyone who commits such a crime must be persuaded by the devil. Now when anyone has committed a crime that is where they are to go, but being that our country has acquired much more land space than it had then, it is a long journey for some, so when a prisoner is to be hung or killed in some manner, the sentence is Capital Punishment and everyone pretends that they are taking the prisoner there.

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