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Where do babies come from?
There have been many stories about where babies come from. The most popular and most generally accepted answer is that babies are born after the copulation of fertile members of the opposite sex. Modern research does not support this answer.

Statistical studies show that each nation's birth rate is inversely proportional to the number of televisions in the country. Said more simply: the more Televisions, the fewer children are born. This clearly indicates that something about television is involved in the reproductive process. The first assumption that science made was that people were copulating with televisions instead of the opposite sex. Research showed that this did in fact result in dramatic decreases in fertility. Unfortunately, this explanation did not fit the evidence the scientists gathered during experiments. Said more simply: there were few reports of burns or ear-splitting screams like those the researchers produced in their experiments.

An alternate explanation was researched, finally the similarity of Televisions to light bulbs was noted and that lead to a major breakthrough. Televisions are like light bulbs in that they attract darkness. So the more televisions, the less darkness exists in a given area. The scientists finally knew that darkness is the key to reproduction. The mini-baby booms reported nine months after power outages confirmed that darkness is important for reproduction.

Our culture calls for night lights for young children. Parents advise their young children to stay safe in well-lighted areas and avoid the dark alleys and corners.

A person staying in the dark on a regular basis is the key to pregnancy and giving birth to babies. Scientific experiments have shown that there is a direct correlation between the number of people are in the dark together and the chance for reproduction. It is almost impossible for a person in the dark alone to become pregnant but once a second person is added the chances for reproduction increase dramatically.

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